The Distant Land of My Father: Forgiveness and family

I love that Bo Caldwell acknowledges that we can have crappy parents, but shows that they can also change.  Or rather that our relationships can change and we can find better ways to be child and parent or parent and child.  I was lucky to have good relationships with my parents, but I have known many people who suffered through difficult times with their parents their entire lives.

It's a beautiful and touching story and a really well-crafted relationship between a daughter and a father she worships and then later a mother she comes to really know and love.  In the end the greatest thing her mother gives her is a reason to find something good in the father who let her down.

Bonus: This awesome mnemonic for remembering Los Angeles street names.

From Main I Spring to Broadway then climb the Hill to Olive. Wouldn't it be Grand if I could Hope to pick a Flower on Figueroa? 

Saint Saturnin de Lucian

This post is looooong delayed, but this experience was so good I still had to write about it.  

This summer I visited my wonderful French family, and my cousin planned an incredible excursion to Saint-Guilhem-le-Desert, a gorgeous town in the Hérault Valley.  What deserves mention here, though, is our stay in Le Mimosa in Saint-Saturnin-de-Lucian.  The hotel is amazing,  especially to those of us who aren't from Europe and aren't used to seeing ancient buildings as part of the day-to-day landscape.  The bottom photo shows the interior of our room.  The giant stone wall jutting out seemingly from nowhere is the remains of the old town walls that were just incorporated into the building of the hotel.  Why waste a good stone wall, right?  

Aside from the room, the hotel owners prepare some of the greatest meals I have ever eaten.  Even better when the food is so good, it was seemingly endless.  Thanks to the help from my cousin and the presence of the owner's brother (who spoke English really well), we got to enjoy great conversation with our meals as well.  

I never would have made it to Saint Saturnin without my dear cousin, but it's definitely a place I would return to.  Incredible food, incredible hotel and all within easy driving distance of incredible wineries.

On the subject of dads and books...

Recently I told the somewhat embarrassing story of going to Lordco in Osoyoos to buy wiper blades.  That story prompted some reflection on my present and past and led to a story about my father.

In the meantime I have still been thinking about the novel Your Face in Mine by Jess Row.  The book is pretty memorable for quite a few reasons.  This book also has a 'dad' connection that is worth a little storytelling.  I got lucky with my own dad, but I also got lucky with my two fathers-in-law, and the book is emblematic of a tiny part of that.

If I walk into my in-laws apartment, I know with unwavering certainty that the coffee table will be covered with an assortment of thought-provoking books.  New and interesting, classic and unforgettable, it's all there.  My fathers-in-law being who they are, they usually encourage us to leave with at least one book.

It's one of those nebulous things that, simply by its existence, reassures and comforts me - something like a bowl of soup on a wet Vancouver afternoon.  It's nice to know that there will always be a pile of books there, that there will be people reading those books, and that someone will insist you take one away to read.

It's nice to know that the people you're stereotypically supposed to dread being around, love to talk to you about books, ideas, films, and plays.  They engage with the world and with you and crave new experiences...

As I'm writing this, I'm realising that I really don't have any point.  I'm not sure where I'm going with this other than to say I'm lucky.  Perhaps I'm just feeling sentimental about Dad and the season in general...

Whatever it is, I am glad to know those books will be there on the coffee table.  Thanks, Dads.

Real Gifts (from 1991)

Sometimes people give gifts that are actually perfect, and you just hope that they are appreciated the right way.  My dad, who was not one for giving or receiving gifts, loved this one.  My sister gave it to him and to my mum for his retirement.  He got rid of almost everything he owned when he came to Thailand, but he brought this.  I kept it for as long as it would last.

This should keep it alive digitally.

"I thought this was the next best way of framing.  Now all you have to do is buy a little sticky hanger thingamajigga and you can have it up on the wall in Dad's office in no time!!!

I'm glad to hear things are going well for you both and look forward to seeing you early in 1992.  All the best. 

Love always,

_______ xoxoxoxoxoxo